The Swaddle Report

The Littlest Soprano

2009-04-25T07:58:00.000-07:00

The Littlest Soprano from Swaddle Report on Vimeo.

Super Hudson Part I: Spotted Dog Rescue

2009-04-25T07:45:00.000-07:00

Hudson Sings His Favorite Hits

2008-01-28T17:06:00.000-08:00

Here's a video of me singing some of my favorite songs: Take Me Out to the Ballgame; Head, Shoulders, Knees and Toes; and Twinkle Twinkle. Feel free to sing along if you know them. If not, then replay it until you learn them.

Tiger on the Loose

2008-01-13T21:55:00.001-08:00

I broke free from the cage that is winter this weekend to attend Tiger Fest, where my favorite Detroit Tigers come to play every year.

I got to meet some Tigers, and swing a baseball bat at a floating ball, and listen to Momma sing the National Anthem.

I also had an emotional reunion (pictured, below) with my friend Paws, who I hadn't seen since the season ended at the end of this summer.

All in all -- aside from mom and dad spilling a tray of nachos with jalapenos and salsa and cheese on me -- the day turned out grrrreat!

Dance Video: Hudson Does the 'Kitty Kat'

2008-01-10T19:18:00.000-08:00

Hudson shows you the step to the latest dance craze, the "Kitty Kat."

Reflecting on 2007

2008-01-01T19:21:00.001-08:00

I'm two years old now, and it's amazing how differently the world looks than when I was one.

A tree is no longer just a tree now. It's an evergreen or a birch. A bird is not just a bird. It's a hawk, a seagull or an Arctic Warbler. And music is no longer just music. It's bands and artists like Raffi, Dan Zanes and Led Zeppelin.

I laugh just thinking about the things I used to laugh about at the immature age of one. And, although I am fond of some of these 2007 age-one memories, I'm eager to make more informed decisions as a two year old in '08, including participating in this year's presidential elections.

I have my bags packed for Iowa, where I will be attending a Caucusing for Kids event. It's just like a regular adult caucus, except it's all kids, and whoever throws the biggest tantrum... their candidate wins. Wish me luck in this endeavor and everything else I take on in 2008. And I wish you the same. Happy New Year.

Cat on the Prowl

2007-11-05T19:40:00.000-08:00

Hey. It's me again. And I'm wearing another disguise.

I'm dressed as a Lion so that Popo the cat will be fooled into thinking I'm a member of his cat family and just as soon as he goes to the shelf to reach for his cat family photo album, to verify my identification, I'll grab his tail!

Where's Hudson? Here He Is!

2007-11-05T19:29:00.000-08:00

Hey. It's me. Back from the farm.

I'm wearing what they call a disguise. I'm thinking about becoming a detective, and this would likely be the outfit I wear so I can be undercover... not like under my blanky undercover, but undercover like a secret sleuth.

This way, I can sneak up on Popo the cat and grab his tail because he won't expect it, because he'll think I'm someone else, or better yet, if my disguise is really working, he won't see me at all.

I'll be back soon with another post, and maybe with another secret sleuth outfit.

City Boy Runs Away to the Farm

2007-06-19T09:57:00.000-07:00

Dear Mom and Dad. It's been fun living with you, but I'm leaving for the farm. My dream is to raise crops and piggies, and you always told me to follow my dreams, so, I'm following those piggies right to the farm, where I belong...

OK. I'm not really running away to the farm, but it sure is fun to visit. This farm didn't have any piggies or horses or cows or tigers or lions, but it did have storytellers and fiddle players and ice cream, so I thought it was a decent tradeoff.

Maybe they used to have horses, because there was plenty of hay there, and they say that hay is for horses, but I didn't see any horses, but I sure did see hay, so I was kind of confused, but I figured instead of spending my time confused, it'd be better to just go with the flow and play in some hay.

I would definitely recommend this farm, except, well, the storytelling was a little bit backward. This man talked about these three little pigs going after a wolf, and huffing and puffing and blowing the wolf's house down. I didn't want to stop him and embarrass him, but from all the books I've read, pigs don't huff and puff... they squeal.

Oh well. No farm is perfect.

I Saw a No Hitter... Where Were You?

2007-06-12T20:56:00.000-07:00

Tomorrow my friends at daycare will ask me, "What'd you do last night Hudson?" And they'll expect my answer to be something like, "Same ol. Ate. Went for a walk. Had some milk. Went to sleep." ... But not this time. This time the answer will be different. This time the answer will be, "Oh. I don't know. Not much. Just went to the Detroit Tigers game, rode the merry-go-round, had a chocolate chip ice cream cookie sandwich... and, oh yeah, did I forget to mention that I witnessed a no hitter!"

I didn't know what a no hitter was before last night, but I now know that it's exciting! If you've never seen one, you should try... but I'm told it might not be that easy. You may never see a no hitter. But I did, and I want to share it with you. So, if you've never seen a no hitter, now you can say you've seen one, on my blog.

I also learned last night that you can take pictures with a phone. Daddy B took this picture with his phone. He was a little overexcited, so he was only able to get the back of my head... I'm just glad I had a chance to comb my hair before the game, otherwise this could have been an embarrassing photo. You can find more bad phone pics of the no hitter at Huddy Pics.

Any Polka Requests?

2007-06-11T07:32:00.001-07:00

I just picked up my first accordion this weekend at the Detroit Festival of the Arts. I didn't get to keep it, but the Polish in me caught on to the instrument real quick.

I had thousands of people polka-ing in the streets to my accordion beats... OK. Maybe that's a stretch, but someday, when I get my own, I'll get good enough to sell out stadiums, or at least fill the living room of one of my grandmas houses.

Did you know that I also found my own park this weekend? Yeah. Somebody named it after me but didn't even tell me or ask me. Doesn't matter. I would have said yes anyway... I'm both flattered and honored. They shouldn't have. Really. They shouldn't have. It's just too much. I don't deserve it... OK. Maybe I do deserve it. In fact, if you ask me, I deserve a bigger park, but I'm not one to complain...

Thanks to whoever made this happen. You know who you are, and I'm sure you read my blog, so, thanks!

Well, that's all the words I have left for now, but you can check out some of my latest adventure pics at HuddyPics.

Hudson and the Big Green Boots

2007-06-04T20:40:00.001-07:00

It's best to read this post before bedtime, so, if you're reading it now, you should stop, and print it out, and give it to your mother or father or guardian and have them read it to you before bed, because it's really a bedtime story and not an at-work or during recess or snack-time story.

It's about a boy named Hudson (you know who he is) and a pair of big green boots (that you haven't met yet). Here it goes:

Once upon a time, on a rainy, but warm day, a boy named Hudson put on a pair of big green boots. He had never worn a pair of big green boots before, but the fact that the boots were BIG and GREEN made it an easy decision.

In those first few steps, Hudson knew he had big shoes to fill. These boots were SUPERsized and his feet were only mediums. The BIG size of the boots and the MEDIUMness of his feets caused this ABOVE AVERAGE size boy to come tumbling down.

Off came one boot, and then another, and he was left on the ground, in his socks, with a scrape and a clump of dirt on his knee and no boo boo cream or handy wipes in site. But that wouldn't stop young Hudson. He was determined, on this rainy day, to complete his mission.

So he put the left boot on first, and then the right one, and with the assistance of one of his parents, he pulled himself up with all his might and started walking again ... one step ... two step ... three step ... four ... until he realized he couldn't count any higher than that. So he switched to ABC steps. A-step... B-step ... C-step ... D-step ... until he ran out of letters. And finally, there it was, the thing he had been searching for, the obstacle that only he and these BIG GREEN boots could conquer -- a giant puddle.

Hudson lifted his right leg higher than ever and brought it down with so much force that the puddle water splashed into his hair. But he didn't care. If he had a comb he would have slicked it back. This was too much fun to let a little water in the hair get in the way. So he took his left leg and lifted it almost as high and brought it down almost as hard (Hudson is right legged, so it's more difficult for him to splash as hard with his left.) and the puddle water splashed in his face. Hudson stuck out his tongue and licked a drop off his chin. Not only was he having fun; he was also quenching his thirst.

The puddle splashing continued for several seconds, splash, after splash, after splash, after splash ... and then he got bored, threw the boots off, and went inside the house to look for some crackers to eat. THE END

Everyday Should Be a Sundae

2007-05-29T20:28:00.001-07:00

Have you ever tried a hot fudge ice cream sundae with a cherry on top? I have... in San Francisco. Well, I'm back home now (That trip was, like, so last week), but I can't stop thinkin about that sundae.

I wonder if you can only get sundaes in California? If so, that's criminal. If not, that means mom and pop have been hiding this treat from me all along, which is also criminal.

I believe that a growing boy like myself needs to have one sundae everyday until he's grown, and then he should have two or three everyday until he's an adult, and then, as an adult, he can eat, like, four or five a day, but they'll have to be low fat because that's what adults eat.

Maybe I'll start a petition of some kind to send to California's governor, to tell him that he needs to share his sundaes with the rest of the world. I'll start working on that, but in the meantime, click here to check out some more pictures of me digging in.

Hudson LIVE From San Francisco Part IV

2007-05-20T08:08:00.000-07:00

It's not often that you get a chance to see a giant head in the grass, but that's what I saw at the Golden Gate Park yesterday -- a giant head in the grass! And it was purple!

Me and a lot of other kids took turns playing with the nose and inside the ears and touching its eyes. There were a lot of signs that told us we should be careful not to damage the head, but we're kids... I mean, you put a giant head in a park and you expect me not to pound on it? Give me a break.

Signs, Signs, Everywhere...
While in the park, I stopped by the art museum where I gave tours to children and small animals. I couldn't read this particular sign that I pointed out to the group, but I don't think they noticed. I'm pretty good at pretending like I can read.

I take pride in making my tours good for the mind and body, involving a little education and a lot of physical fitness. We didn't see many paintings, but I led my group up and down the museum stairs about 72 times.

This is another sign we found in the park. There were actually several of these stuck to trees and most of them were directed to a guy named Tony. So, if you're reading this blog Tony, you should probably get to the pizzeria quickly or your friend is gonna get mad.

And like the day before, our long journey ended at the ocean, this time at Ocean Beach. But we didn't make it very far along the beach because the wind didn't want us to... it was blowing sand at us really hard and it basically told us to go away and come back later. That's OK. The view was good from where we were at. And, according to this sign, it wouldn't have been very safe for me to dip my toes in this part of the ocean. Oh well. There's more journeys ahead, so I'll sign off for now, put on some clothes (I'm blogging in my diaper), and head back to the streets.

Hudson LIVE From San Francisco Part III

2007-05-19T01:16:00.001-07:00

Oooh. Look at me. I'm doing hard time for stealing a pacifier. I'm going to spend my second birthday in the slammer. My criminal name is "Babyface." Ha... Ha... Ha... Very funny mom and dad. Put the baby in a prison cell while he's sleeping and snap a photo. Like we haven't seen that one before...

OK. So I slept through most of the trip to Alcatraz. What are you going to do? It wasn't really my fault. If they would have just let me climb up those stairs on the boat ride over I wouldn't have had that tantrum and wouldn't have wore myself out. I mean, c'mon. They weren't that dangerous. So I might have tumbled over into the ocean or something. I bet it's not even that deep.

I did wake up in time for the tail-end of the excursion, to catch some of the wildlife -- birds and plants and... more birds. I bet I really could have shook those prison bars. And there were probably some cool things to climb inside the prison, too. Dad, you couldn't have given me a little wake-up nudge to say, "Hey. Hudson. We're on Alcatraz -- the world's most famous prison. You should probably wake up." Or, mom, couldn't you have picked me up out of my stroller and said, "OK buddy. Enough sleep. You're missing out on some prime playtime." ... Oh well. There'll be other prisons.

We Found the Beach
Who said there were no beaches in San Francisco? Well, we found them, and I conquered them... OK. Maybe not conquered. But I did dip my feet in the water at this first beach. Pretty brave for a 16-month old, right? Did you dip your feet in a shark-infested ocean when you were this little? Did you risk getting cold toe disease by dipping your feet in really cold water when you were just a baby boy or girl? Did you have to run as fast as you can to escape a bunch of pirates that landed ashore? ... I did all of those things. (You can't see the pirate ships here, but you can check them out at HuddyPics.)

And you wouldn't believe all of the wind surfers I saw at the next beach. They were crazy. Some of them were flying kites and then they would get in the water and the kites would pull them across the water really fast. I just got a kite not too long ago. It's still in the box, but when I get home, I'm going to fly it and pretend like I'm gliding across the ocean, except I won't be in the ocean. I'll be on the grass somewhere... but isn't that what pretending is all about?

OK. That's enough for today. I'm told by my parents that we have no plans for the next day of our vacation, so I can't give you any hints on what to expect in my next post, so, just come back and find out for yourself. See ya soon.

Hudson LIVE From San Fran Part II

2007-05-18T06:04:00.001-07:00

Once upon a time there was a little boy wearing a little red hooded sweatshirt, and his name was little red Hudson hood... gotcha! This isn't story time. That was just a joke, but I was wearing a red hooded sweatshirt during my trip to see the biggest trees in the world, and an old man did walk by and say, "Look at that little boy. He's like Little Red Riding Hood." And I quietly replied, "Yeah, except that Little Red Riding Hood is a girl!" But I wasn't mad at him. There was too much beauty around to be concerned about a gender mixup.

So check out these trees. That's little ol' me making my way down this path. I asked mom and dad if I could find my way through the woods on my own and they agreed that I was old enough and responsible enough to take on the task... Just kidding again. I hope you didn't fall for that one. I'm only 16 months old. I can't walk through the woods alone yet -- at least not until I'm about 18 or 19 months.

Big Park in the Sky
I told you yesterday that San Francisco was a great place for parks. Well, check out this one we found in the middle of the sky. I call it Sky Park. Go for a swing and you feel like you're swinging on top of the world. Go for a slide and you feel like you're sliding on top of the world. Fall off the playscape and you feel like you're falling from the top of the world. I especially liked the sandy surface. It was fun to walk through and run my hands through, except it's hard to sleep at night with sand in your diaper.

Well, it's time to shake it all out and head on to my next adventure. I'll be back with more later...

In the meantime, you can check out more pics of the San Francisco trip at: http://www.flickr.com/photos/huddypics/.

Hudson LIVE From San Francisco

2007-05-17T07:07:00.000-07:00

Hey everybody back there in the rest of the world, I'm in San Francisco! This is my first trip to this place, so I thought I should make a big splash by sending you daily updates of what I'm doing and pass it along to you, in case you ever leave your world to come here.

I'll be filing all of my posts by myself this week since mom and dad said we couldn't afford to buy plane tickets for Jenny the Cat or Gary the Gnome or any of my other staff members, and there wasn't any room in the suitcase for them either. Don't worry guys. I can handle the load, and I'll be sure to bring you all back some souvenirs from my trip (that's what good managers do).

Anyway, that's enough business talk, let's get back to the fun part -- vacation! Every good vacation starts with eating, and after a long long flight (p.s. mom graded my flight behavior as a B-; dad gave me a B... Give me a break. I would say B+ at least. It's a loooong flight!), me and the ol' parents decided to stop in Chinatown for a bite. My meal started with an appetizer of sliced apples and pot stickers followed by sesame street chicken. OK. It's actually just called sesame chicken. There's no "street," but that was a little joke or shout out to my favorite show, and to all the babies out there who are fans of my blog and the show, too. And getting back to the meal, let's not forget the ice cream and fortune cookie dessert. My behavior may have been in the B range, but this meal was an A+.

San Francisco: The Swing Set City
One measure of a great city is its swing sets, and when it comes to swing sets, San Francisco has it going on. Check out the air I was getting with this swing. I was turning heads. People were, like, "Wow. Where's that baby from? He an unbelievable swing master!"

While You Were Sleeping

One thing that I learned from vacationing is that if you sleep, you might miss something ... like a real live submarine! Why mom and dad didn't wake me up for this one, I'll never know, but I guess I have this picture to look back on... except for this lady (no offense lady) is kind of in the way of the submarine. Maybe she's the captain of it. If that's the case, then she has a right to be in the way, but if she's just a lady looking at a submarine, then she should be more mindful of the fact that there are sleeping babies out there who only have pictures to rely on to see a real live underwater vessel.

I also slept through a challenge. This arm wrestling master apparently wanted to challenge me, but I was sleeping. But I'm not afraid of him. In fact, I'll say it right here. I challenge you Mr. Arm Wrestler man to a match. One of these days on vacation while I'm awake, I'm coming back with my 25 cents and we're going to go at it. Mark my word. I'll be back.

Lions in the Sea?
Did you know that the lions in San Francisco live in the sea? I didn't, but I do now. And these guys don't look like your normal lions. They're slimey and they bark like dogs. But they're awful funny. I got an up-close look at em and I even got a chance to talk to a few of them... and I found that they're pretty nice guys... and girls. I let them know that when I head back for my big arm wrestling challenge later this week, I'll stop by and say hello... and I'll be sure to stop back by the blog to say hello to all of you, and provide you with regular updates of my trip. So stay tuned!

I H2Owe It All to You Mom

2007-05-14T11:37:00.000-07:00

There are two elements a baby needs to survive in this world: Water and Mom. Water helps keep you hydrated and washes down chunks of peas or apples that are stuck in your throat. Mom helps keep you warm and safe and she'll even use her finger to clear out any chunks that the water missed to prevent you from choking.

So, this post is to you Mr. Water and to you Mrs. Mom.

I got to play with Mr. Water recently in the form of a fountain park, or splash pad or water miracle... whatever you call it, there was water coming out of the ground, from everywhere.

Just when I thought I had outsmarted these little fountains, they'd pop up and get me. But I didn't mind. Being in a diaper and running through water is the sign that summer is here, and that makes me happy.

And you'll notice in this photo, of me and Mrs. Mom, that I'm a little bit scarred up. That's another thing mom is good at -- comforting me after I get up from a fall with a few gashes or bruises on my face or body.

There's nothing better than mom for healing ... well, neosporin works good, too, but it doesn't wipe away the tears or pick me up and hug me... at least the neosporin I use doesn't do that. If you know of a better brand that takes care of those things, please share in the comments below.

Anyway, this was my Happy Mothers Day post, so Happy Mothers Day mom. And as soon as Happy Water Day comes around, I'll send a Happy Water Day shout out to you Mr. Water.

If you like these pics, there's more in the HuddyPics gallery.

Report filed by: Jenny the Cat (indoor content and photos with mom) and Gary the Gnome (outdoor content and photos of water).

Swaddle Report 2.0: New Staff, New Attitude, Same Baby

2007-05-09T19:59:00.000-07:00

I bet you thought I had forgotten you. Well, I didn't. I'm back. And I've hired a staff of my friends to assist me in updating The Swaddle Report, to keep you informed, educated and hip to the happenings in Hudson's life.

First let me introduce you to my dedicated team, and then I'll give you an idea of what to expect from this all-star squad.

Editor in Chief: Hudson
It's my life, so I have the final say in how it's covered.

Outdoor Correspondent: Gary the Gnome
Gary will help write stories about anything that I do outside the house -- walk-in-the-park stories, swinging stories, zoo stories.

Indoor Correspondent: Jenny the Cat
Jenny will help write stories about anything I do indoors -- spilling toys, climbing things, napping.

Swaddle Cafe Chef: Bob the Big Boy
Bob's Slim Jim is an employee favorite.

Human Resources: Derrick the Buddha
If you want a job at The Swaddle Report, just tell Derrick. He'll accept anyone's application. He's a real calm and easy going guy.

What you can expect from my staff? Our goals as an organization are based on the three Qs:

Quantity: At least two blog posts per week
Quality: When Bob the Big Boy is not cooking burgers, he'll be in charge of spell checking
Questions: We're not afraid to ask the tough questions, like: Where did you put daddy's cell phone? Or, why are there apple chunks in the laundry basket?

Hey, and if you want to keep up with recent photos of me that you may have missed, click this: http://www.flickr.com/photos/huddypics/.

From the Video Archives

2007-03-27T09:48:00.000-07:00

I dusted this old video off for the enjoyment of my blog viewers. It's just me watching some TV, a little Blues Clues. Love the show, but it always throws me off balance. Might be the bright colors. Anyway, check it out:

March Madness: Hudsodamus Predictions

2007-03-27T09:14:00.000-07:00

It's time for Hudsodamus' annual March Madness Final Four picks.

Right now there are four teams left: the Georgetown Hoyas (I think that's a dog of some type), the Ohio State Buckeyes (I think those come from a tree), the Florida Gators (Scary reptiles with big teeth that I see sleeping at my local zoo, but I'm not sure if the ones that I know are from Florida), and the UCLA Bruins (it's a bear, I think).

Now, after doing some calculations and looking into my crystal basketball (OK. It's actually made of cushy stuff, but you get the idea.), I came up with the following prediction: After this weekend, there will only be two of those teams left.

Let me break it down for you. There are four teams now. There will be two games this weekend, with two teams involved in each game. Only one team will win each of those games. So, if you add one plus one, that equals two teams left.

Hope that helps you all out in filling out those final spots on your bracket. I'll be back next week to make a prediction on how many teams will be left after the championship game.

The Wonderful World of Colored Pasta

2007-03-05T10:30:00.000-08:00

Hey. It's my first day at day care, with other kids. They think I'm totally cool.

There are lots of fun things to do here. It's very colorful. Even the pasta noodles have color.

I'm eating some of them in this picture. It's funny, they are all different colors, but they still taste like pasta. Kind of brilliant really.

I'm thinking about inventing colored baby formula... how much would your infant love being able to sip from a bottle full of blue stuff, or red stuff, or green or purple stuff.

Ooh. I gotta go. We're all leaving for diving lessons now ... Just kidding mom. I knew that would put a scare in her.

Winter Break: Hudson's Adventures With Flat Stanley

2007-03-04T18:31:00.000-08:00

Hello blog readers. It's been a while since you've heard from me. I've been out of reach, on a month-long sledding journey with my sled partner, Flat Stanley.

The journey started at Grandma D's house, where she packed us some rations -- Cheerios, sliced bananas, organic whole milk in a bottle, and a couple of sippy cups full of H2O -- before we set off for our journey across the arctic tundra.

This was my first big sled trip, so Flat Stan navigated, while I steered tough curves like the one in this picture (left). Flat Stan said he was glad I came along because he has trouble putting his body into big turns like this... he's flat you know.

After several days of tough conditions, Flat Stan and I made it to the palace of the Ice Clown King, where Stan and all his other flat friends and family members were created. The Ice Clown King was happy to see Stan, and he gave him a hug.

The Ice Clown King invited us in to keep warm from the cold. I parked my sled at his doorstep and made myself at home.

The Ice Clown King then fed us a hearty meal. Boy were Stan and I hungry. I swear, we ate so much so fast that after we were done, Stan's stomach was no longer flat. And I could barely get the sled to move my own plump little belly.

Finally, with a little help from the king himself, we shoved off from the palace and headed back home. I dropped Stan off at his house, and he waved goodbye. Our adventure was over, but we both knew there would be more adventures ahead of us.

Jan. 29, 2007 Day 396: My Night at the Museum

2007-01-25T10:11:00.000-08:00

So I recently went on a dinosaur hunt -- or recruiting trip -- at a museum. Daddy B tried to hold me back because he thought it would be dangerous, but adventure is in my blood, and nothing could stand in the way of my journey.

I first discovered this mastadon when scouting out the area from above. He looked sort of like an elephant, except not as cute. They kept him in this cage because of his big teeth and giant tusks, but I quickly found my way down and inside to get a closer look.

When I got up close to the mastadon, I realized he must just be misunderstood. He wasn't mean or scary at all. In fact, he was pretty quiet, and we got along pretty well. I consider him a friend now. I told him I'd put a picture of him in my blog and it made him smile. He also became the first member, and vice president, of the Hudson and His Dino Friends Club (HAHDFC).

Just when I thought I was safe, this T-rex tried to sneak up on me, but I was able to calm him down by doing my T-rex dance. It made him laugh, and he too decided to join the HAHDFC.

I also got stegosaurus to join the club, and he agreed to be the secretary and take meeting notes.

This guy joined the club, too, but... I'm embarrassed to say, I forgot his name. Hopefully he'll forgive me and still come on board. And if there's any other dinos that read my blog out there, feel free to inquire about the HAHDFC. We are currently recruiting more members. Specifically, we're looking for a pterodactyl and a brontosaurus. So, if you know one, please let them know that we'd love for them to join.

Jan. 22, 2007 Day 389: Hudson's First Film

2007-01-22T10:51:00.000-08:00

Hello blog readers. Long time no post. I've been working on my first film, a silent short called, "The Tantrum." This was shot on location in New York. Hope you enjoy:

Jan. 8, 2007 Day 375: The Effects of Snow Globe Warming

2007-01-08T18:32:00.000-08:00

As my first winter as a grown up baby approaches the halfway point, I've come to two "if then" conclusions:

1. If there's no snow, then there's no sledding
2. If there's no snow, then your snow globe must be warming

The snow global warming in my area has been so hot this winter that I haven't got a chance to try out my new ride that I've nicknamed "The Big Red Sled Named Ned" or just "Ned" for short.

Ned and I have been couped up all winter, waiting for the white stuff to fall so we can find a small hill and take a test drive.

I told Ned that a warming snow globe was the cause of our sled-free winter, but Ned said that he and the other red sleds disagree, and that snow globe warming was a hoaky theory created by a bunch of blue sleds.

Either way, I hope that Ned and I will get the chance to burn rubber... or melt ice this winter.

Jan. 2, 2007 Day 369: Hudson Is #1!

2007-01-02T15:55:00.000-08:00

Hey everybody. I'm #1 years-old! Check out this special birthday slideshow spectacular that I put together as a tribute to my #1 birthday party.

Dec. 31, 2006 Day 367: Merry Belated Christmas

2006-12-31T16:56:00.000-08:00

I'm catching up on some overdue posting, so, umm, Merry Christmas!

Dec. 27, 2006 Day 363: Dada, Momma and MoMA -- My 1st Trip to NY City

2006-12-27T07:15:00.000-08:00

From museums to shopping to long walks through Central Park, I did it all on my first trip to the Big Apple.

This here is a picture (left) of me at MoMA. MoMA is different from momma. Momma is my mom, Momma CJ. MoMA is a museum. It does not feed me or change my clothes or give me baths, but it does show me art... and I like art.

This picture here is of me and papa. Papa is not a museum, he's my dad, Daddy B. We both got an up close look at this big tree with lights on it in Rockefeller Center.

In Detroit, I take cars, well, I sit in the back seat of cars, rearfacing, to get wherever I need to go. In New York, people take something called a subway to get to places like toy stores and parks and stuff like that. This is me getting ready to get on the #2 train. The #2 is my favorite of all of the trains that I rode. I rode the 3 and the 4, but the 2 is still closest to my heart. I have a lot more to ride, but I'm not sure they'll top #2.

This picture is what I like to call a "Photo of My Family," or "A Family Photo. This is me and Daddy B and Momma CJ in the Center Park. (photo courtesy of Uncle B!) Someday, I'd like to go on the ice with the ice skating people that you can see in the bottom of the picture.

This is me here at Bryant Park, where I got real up close to the ice skating people. Mr. Bryant sure did make a nice ice rink here. Hopefully, someday, I'll get to skate on that, too.

Whenever I needed a refresh on food and a place to get warm, I hung out at Auntie So's loft, where I met lots of other art works.

I also was treated to a fancy steak meal by Chef Leland. He's my double cousin... or is it second cousin... my #2 cousin. Yeah. That's it. He's my #2 cousin, and he makes great steak!

They say New York is the city that never sleeps... well, maybe that doesn't count for 1-year-olds... Yeah, by the way. I'll be 1 year's old in, like, two days. I'm glad I got to conquer New York before my first birthday, but, it's also good to be back home. Stay tuned for my first birthday bash post. Thanks for reading.

Dec. 12, 2006 Day 349: Hope Santa's Not Mad About His Glasses

2006-12-12T06:49:00.000-08:00

I met Santa Claus this past weekend, but I'm not sure that it went all that well.

I was doing good, telling him how wonderful of a boy I've been all year -- how I help bring joy to my parents and family and to all of my blog readers -- but as I was explaining all of this to him, I couldn't stop looking at his glasses, and I couldn't stop thinking how fun it would be to play with them.

Well, I got the glasses, but that may be all I'm getting this holiday season. I hope that you can forgive me Mr. Claus. We babies sometimes have a mind of our own... Now, I know that's not an excuse for my behavior, but I hope that you'll take that into consideration when you pass by my chimney on Christmas morning.

Luckily, I hit it off with this reindeer named Randolph, so, he may be able to sweet talk the big guy into to stopping by when that sleigh comes passing by my house. Hook me up Randy!

Dec. 11, 2006 Day 348: My First Flu

2006-12-11T06:41:00.000-08:00

OK. Because I was caught up in all the hype of my Times Square appearance, I forgot to mention last week that I just got over a case of the flu.

I know what you're saying, "Hudson? Sick? That's impossible. He looked great on that billboard." But sometimes, I admit, that I put a face on for the camera, even though I might not be feeling well. So, I thought I'd use this post to show that, like all other babies, I too get sick, and cry and scream -- especially when mom takes her cell phone away from me... I don't know why I can't have it! ... Sorry. Where was I? ... Oh yeah... Not everyday is full of red rose petal leafs. Somedays you have the flu.

Luckily, mom got me this new chair, so I was able to sit back and relax, and with a lot of water, and a lot of crackers, I was able to overcome my first virus.

Now who's smiling Mr. Flu?

Dec. 4, 2006 Day 341 BREAKING UPDATE: Hudson Makes It to Times Square!

2006-12-04T07:46:00.000-08:00

Dear blog readers, I have an exciting update: My face, the one that has appeared in countless photos on this blog, has now been shared with the world in a billboard in Times Square. No joke!

Take a look at this shot that was displayed on the TIME Person of the Year billboard on Dec. 3, 2006, at 8:03 a.m.

I'd like to say "thank you" to those of you who voted for me for person of the year in the poll I posted to my last blog entry. And for those of you who voted for Polo the Cat, well, you don't see his face in Times Square, do you?

I've been talking with my agent, and we're working on setting up a session for me to autograph copies of my Person of the Year photo. Stay tuned for the details.

Nov. 28, 2006 Day 335: Hudson for Person of the Year?

2006-11-28T21:30:00.000-08:00

You may see my round face in Times Square soon.

I was recently nominated for the Person of the Year honor, which would earn me a spot on the cover of the Time magazine and on a big board in Times Square.

Who do you think should be person of the year? I did up a survey where you can pick your person... I voted for myself... Sorry, Polo.

&amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;lt;a href="http://not-a-real-namespace/http://polls.blogflux.com/poll-6200.html"&amp;amp;amp;amp;gt;Take the poll&amp;amp;amp;lt;/a&amp;amp;amp;gt;&amp;amp;amp;lt;br /&amp;amp;amp;gt;&amp;amp;amp;lt;br /&amp;amp;amp;gt;&amp;amp;amp;lt;a href="http://not-a-real-namespace/http://polls.blogflux.com/"&amp;amp;amp;amp;gt;Free Poll by Blog Flux&amp;amp;amp;lt;/a&amp;amp;amp;gt;

Nov. 27, 2006 Day 334 SPECIAL EDITION: Thanksgiving Memories

2006-11-27T08:53:00.000-08:00

I'm going to get a onesie with words printed on it that say, "I conquered Thanksgiving. Did you?"

From parade watching, to ice skating watching, to turkey eating and watching others eat turkey, I did it all. Now, let's take a look back at the events that took place:

The "Biggest Bar Night"

I overheard mom and dad saying the day before Thanksgiving is the "biggest bar night of the year." I'm not sure what that means exactly, but it sounds like some sort of competition. Me, mom and dad decided to spend this "biggest bar night of the year" watching ice skating people.

I've never been on ice before, but it looks like you have to have some sort of special shoes to walk on it. I've opened and closed my closet doors several hundred times, and I've never seen any shoes like this, so, it looks like I'll have to get some if I want to do any walking on the slippery stuff.

After watching the ice people, we went to a tie place to eat tie food. The food was not in knots, so I'm not sure why they call it tie... but it tasted good anyway. We were the only people in the restaurant, so I got to walk around and touch all of the chairs.

What's Today?
"What's today? Parade day!" That was the chant that was going on around town as I prepared to go to my first-ever Thanksgiving Day parade. Mom and Dad got me all bundled up to watch from the streets, but I didn't even need the bundle since some friends of ours let me in this tall building to watch from above. Someone told me that getting upstairs to watch makes you a V-I-P. So, I guess you can call me V-I-P from now on. Or, you can just call me Hudson like everyone else does.

Anyway, I enjoyed watching the floaties that passed by the windows, and I got to see all the tiny people lined up on the street screaming and yelling at the floaties. I laughed and screamed and yelled, too, from above, but I don't think they could hear me.

Turkey Time
I've read that British babies have something they call "tea time," and dads of British and American babies have something they call "tee time," but this baby has something I like to call "turkey time."

Turkey time is the time when you sit down to eat turkey. Pretty clever, right?

Well, I spent my turkey time at Grandma D's and boy did I ever stuff myself with stuffing and turkey and sweet potatoes and more sweet potatoes and more turkey and water and soy milk and more soy milk and pumpkin pie!!! Have you tried this stuff? Nobody told me. I think they were keeping it a secret so they could have more to themselves... well, the secret is out now, and I'm now in the pumpkin pie fan club.

Needles to say, it was a feast to remember, and like I said in my last post, a stomach to forget. I said goodbye to my days of being a lean-bellied baby, and said hello to my unbuttoned-pants future.

Nov. 21, 2006 Day 328: Say Goodbye Stomach

2006-11-21T07:51:00.000-08:00

Hello readers. It's been a while since I've spoke to you, but here's the update: I'm real close to walking. I'm not quite there yet, but I'm close. Let's just say I'm taking baby steps. Hah! That was funny wasn't it. Baby steps. Oh boy. What a hoot.

Anyway, you may be wondering why I have this ancient photo posted. Well, that there is what I call "The History of My Stomach." Take a good look at that lean physique because it's going to be gone after Turkey Day.

This will be my first Thanksgiving ever and I plan on eating twice my weight in food. I'm going to have turkey and mashed potatoes and green beans and squash and sweet potatoes and ... more sweet potatoes and when my mom is not looking, I'm going to bat my eyelashes at Grandma D and charm her into giving me some pumpkin pie.

I think Grandma D will be making most of the food, but I'm going to bring a dish to contribute to the festivities: I call it "Formula." Dig in everybody!

Well, that's all for now folks, but before you log off your computer, don't forget to say goodbye to my stomach. It's the last time you'll see it.

Nov. 12, 2006 Day 319: Hudson's Tribute to the Creator of 'Upside-Down Baby'

2006-11-12T20:11:00.000-08:00

This post is dedicated to the creator of one of the best games ever created, the "Upside-Down Baby" game.

Who is the genious behind this playtime activity that defies gravity? Momma CJ!

Happy Birthday Momma CJ. I was going to buy you a card, but Daddy B said you don't like cards, so I thought I would do a post on my blog, The Swaddle Report, instead. Are you familiar with my blog, mom? Just kidding. I know you've read it before.

Anyway, I'm glad that we are mom and son, and it's always fun playing with you, and I hope that someday when I'm bigger, I can flip you upside down, so you can experience the funnest part of the game you invented. But no matter how big I am, and no matter if I'm right side up or upside down, I'll always look up to you for your inventioning and your beautiful singing voice and being a pretty girl (dad told me to throw in that last one). Happy birthday mom!

Nov. 7, 2006 Day 314 ELECTION DAY: Hudson in 2048

2006-11-06T22:49:00.000-08:00

I may be a future president of the United States of America, according to sources close to me (my mom and dad and grandparents).

You, my readers, might be asking, "Hudson, what makes you think you could be president?" My answer would simply be, "All it takes is a handshake."

That's right. I shook the hand of a former president (William Jefferson Clinton) this weekend, and I'm pretty sure that's how most of the presidents became presidents, so, you can start getting the Hudson in '48 buttons made... I picked 2048 as the year I would run. I figure that will give me some time to finish school and get my hair white enough to become a president.

Anyway, enough politicking speak. I am a baby who believes that the pictures are in the pudding... or the proof is in the pictures... something like that. Here's a play-by-play of my presidential handshake. The shake took place somewhere between the second and third photos. Don't believe me? Just ask Bill Clinton. The yellow arrows in the pictures will help guide you through this tour:

Oct. 31, 2006 Day 307 Halloween SPECIAL: Hudson as the ChickoBikerSaurus

2006-10-31T22:13:00.000-08:00

Hello blog readers. Hope you had a happy Halloween. If you guessed that was me, as the chicken, in the last post, you were right... but that's not all I was during my spooktacular Halloweekend, which included events such as walking like a chicken through the rain, posing as a dinosaur and rooting Daddy B on in a marathon and meeting up with my friend Skeletine for some trick or treating. I put together a slidingshow below of some of my costume changes. WARNING: Some of the slides may be scary to some readers who are easily scared. (My Uncle R told me to put that disclaimer on here. He's what they call a lawyer.)

Get Your Own! | View Slideshow

Oct. 30, 2006 Day 306: Halloween Sneak Peek

2006-10-30T20:04:00.000-08:00

Who's that crazy chicken? You'll find out Wednesday morning when Hudson releases his first annual Halloween Spooktacular Special Edition post.

Be sure to come back and check it out, unless you're afraid of chickens?

Oct. 24, 2006 Day 300 SPECIAL EDITION: Hudson Sucks His Thumb in the Thumb (of Michigan)

2006-10-24T06:40:00.000-07:00

Hello blog readers. I just returned from a trip to the thumb area of Michigan with a brand new old-school Tigers jacket and a new attitude. Boy how a trip like that can take away the stress of baby life. I recommend it to all my young readers out there. And I'm sure my older readers have stress, too, and could use a visit to the thumb. Well, if you do go, consider these photos as a guide on how to make friends and get the most out of your thumb visit.

First, it's always fun to travel with pals. We made our thumb trip with my friend Baby C and her parents, Momma A and Daddy N. Here's me and Baby C playing in the grass. I am a little bit jealous of her walking skills, but hope to be able to challenge her to a race someday once I get past this crawling thing. I like crawling alright, but I sure could see a lot more if I could get those legs to stay up underneath me. I think now that I'm rested I'm going to start working with some leg weights to build my walking strength.

Second thing to do is to experience the thumb wildlife. In this photo, hiding underneath the table, is a goatdog. He looks like a dog and looks like a goat at the sametime, which makes him a goatdog. He was shy at first, but eventually we became friends and he even started talking to me in goat talk. I asked Daddy B to translate it for me, but he apparently doesn't speak goat. They must not have taught that at the school he went to. Hopefully I will be given the opportunity to learn goat when I start my educational career.

Third thing to do is seek out historic landmarks, like this Wimpy statue. Wimpy likes hamburgers. I don't know if I like hamburgers yet, but I didn't let that get in the way of a potential friendship. I'm also not a statue, and Wimpy is. But the thing we did have in common is that we both agreed that babies and statues can be friends, despite their differences.

Fourth thing to do is find a pier and some graffiti. Now I'm not saying you should do the graffiti yourself, because that's against the people rulebook, but if you find some, it's OK to look at it. But either way, make sure you walk out to the end of the pier, so you can get a good look at the water. I wanted to take a bath in it too, but Momma and Daddy said it was too cold. Maybe next time...

And fifthly, get some rest! A thumb trip is not a thumb trip without a nap. But if you have trouble sleeping, just make sure you bring a pacifier along... puts me right out.

Hope you enjoyed this post, and I hope you too will take the time to have yourself a thumb trip. Go thumb!

Oct. 18, 2006 Day 294: Leave the Biting to Me Buddy

2006-10-18T19:13:00.000-07:00

There's a new boy that's living in our building. His name is Buddy. He's a dog. He belongs to Mr. KoGo, the man upstairs.

Buddy likes to play. He also likes to steal my left socks, and bite me in the tuckus (pssst... if you didn't already know, that's another word for a behind, or, as some less sophisticated babies call it, a butt.)

I think Buddy is my friend. We both have our strengths and weaknesses, but we complement each other well. Buddy has a tail and walks really fast, but he pees on the floor. I stopped peeing on the floor a long time ago, but I still need help with the walking, and I haven't grown a tail yet.

I wonder at what age it starts growing? It must be old because Momma CJ and Daddy B don't have tails, and they're really old. Hmmm? Maybe I'll ask Buddy the next time I see him. He's little, but like me, he's smart for his age and knows all sorts of little facts like that.

Anyway, I got to go... I need to find my sock. "Hey Buddy! Where'd you put my sock? Did you eat it again?"

Oct. 8, 2006 Day 284: Patty-cake 101

2006-10-08T19:59:00.000-07:00

Grandma D taught me the patty-cake, and now I'm going to teach it to you!

Oct. 7, 2006 Day 283: Welcome to the Hudson Show

2006-10-07T10:21:00.000-07:00

Hey everybody! I recently visited a place called the Children's Museum and I put on my own puppet show... and guess who was the star of the show? You're looking at him.

It was a great show and I would like to first start off by thanking my fans for coming out and supporting me. I would then like to thank Momma CJ and Daddy B for holding me up while I performed on stage... my balance is sketchy at times. But most of all I would like to thank my supporting cast -- Broccoli Rob, Sweet Potato Brown, Mr. Droopy Head, the Alligator and the rest of the puppet crew.

And, I'd also like to give a shout out to Auntie HB, who helped to teach me what a stage presence is. Happy Birthday Auntie HB! My show will be hitting the road, just like you, sometime soon. I'll post the tour dates as soon as we lock them up.

Oct. 2, 2006 Day 278: Who's on First? Hudson Is!

2006-10-02T07:15:00.000-07:00

Hey everyone. I went to my first baseball game this past week.

It was the Tigers vs. the Blue Birdies and, unfortunately, the Blue Birdies won.

Kenny Rogers was on the mound for the Tigers and I have to say that he didn't have his best stuff. He was having some control issues and was missing on his curveball. From a baby's perspective, I would have to say he looked a little "rattled." Get it? Like a baby's rattle? (If you don't like that joke, blame Nurse Irene. I've been telling bad jokes since Day One because of her.)

But it was OK that the Tigers didn't win because I had fun eating, and watching the game and napping during the seventh inning stretch and spending the day with Momma CJ and Daddy B.

By the way, it was Daddy B's birthday, so I dedicate this post to him.

Even though his birthday was on Thursday, we celebrated it all weekend long. I thought it would never end, but he tells me I can do the same when my first birthday comes at the end of December... and he said that I'll know when my birthday is over because they will drop a big ball from the sky in New York City to mark the end of Hudson's birthday. I hear a lot of people are expected to attend the occasion. I can't wait!

Sept. 25, 2006 Day 271: Swaddle Report Second Annual Fall Photo Montage SPECIAL

2006-09-25T21:48:00.000-07:00

It's the moment you, all of my readers, have been waiting for: the return of Hudson's annual fall photo montage... OK. So, you're saying to yourself, "Hudson. You're not even a year old. How can this be the second annual photo montage?"

Well, my answer is, "This photo montage is so good that you would think I've done this before, like, this is my second time or something." So, I called it my second annual. Besides, I challenge you to look at some of Momma CJ's magazines and find a better photo montage. I've ripped through a lot of them, and I can tell you that they have a lot of shiny pages, but there's no substance. I would compare them to a bottle with no soy formula in it, a sleeping baby without a blanket, potatoes without the sweet... empty. Anyway, enough about those silly magazines. Let's take a look this collage that I like to refer to as: "A Baby in the Park Playing on a Slide, a Tree, a Tube, a Hand Stand, and a Rhinoceres Springy Thing."

Sept. 21, 2006 Day 267: Dog Days of Summer Over? Not Yet

2006-09-21T21:38:00.000-07:00

The Dog Days of Summer might be over for most of you, but my days of dressing up as a dog are just beginning.

I thought I'd play a trick on Popo the cat by putting on this dog outfit, and boy did my trick pay off. I had Popo running up the walls when I turned my usual "Ba Ba" and "Goo Goo" noises into a "Woof Woof" and chased him around the house.

I'm thinking about asking Mom and Dad if they'll turn in all of my other clothes and get me more animal outfits.

I would like to be a lion so I can roar, a duck so I can quack, and a bear ... just because I think I have a lot in common with bears. We both take long naps, and I'm sure bears like Cheerios like I do. But what animal doesn't like Cheerios? Well, if such an animal exists, I don't want to dress up as that animal because that would mean if I wanted to really be like that animal, I would have to pretend like I didn't like Cheerios, and I don't think I would be very convincing in that part.

Gotta go. All this talk is making me hungry. Woof! Woof!

Sept. 18, 2006 Day 264: Bounce With Me, Bounce With Me

2006-09-18T19:36:00.000-07:00

I went to bouncy world this past weekend for my cousin M's #2 birthday.

Momma CJ and Daddy B were, at first, afraid to bounce with me, but I convinced them to give it a whirl.

I thought it was pretty easy, but I understand that other people may struggle with bouncing. That's why I thought I'd take some time to give you a few tips so you can maybe join us in our next bouncing adventure.

Bouncing Tip #1: Bring a clean pair of socks -- It's hard to bounce with gunk on your feet.

Bouncing Tip #2: Bring a positive attitude -- If you walk into bouncy world frown-faced, you'll have a hard time getting off of your feet.

Bouncing Tip #3: Bring a cheering section -- My cheering fans helped lift me off the ground.

Bouncing Tip #4: Take a nap on the way to bouncy world -- A little shut eye will put that extra spring in your step.

Bouncing Tip #5: Be the bunny -- Get in a rabbit state of mind and you'll find yourself hopping with ease.

Hope these tips will help you when you're faced with your next bouncing challenge. I have a few others, but I have to keep those to myself in case I ever enter a competitive bouncing league.

Sept. 18, 2006 Day 264: Swaddle Report BONUS Throwback Edition

2006-09-18T19:27:00.000-07:00

Since I haven't talked to you, my readers, in a while, I thought I would provide a little bonus coverage this week.

This here is a throwback photo of me in my youth.

Oh, look at young Hudson. I was pretty cute back then, huh? Ha. Ha. Ha... adorable. Oh how I grow. I remember this day like it was yesterday.

I woke up and had a bottle, and slept, and had another bottle, and slept some more... that was a great day... but let's not get caught up in the past here. There are many more great days to be had.

I wonder if I can still fit into those pajamas? They look comfortable.

Sept. 12, 2006 Day 258: Who Needs a Spoon?

2006-09-11T21:14:00.000-07:00

Well, if you haven't heard already, I've been hand-eatin these days: breadsticks, cheese, Cheerios.... you set it in front of me, I'll eat it.

Give me that finger of yours, I'll eat it.

Give me a toe, I'll eat it.

Give me some ice cream... and you'll get scolded by Momma CJ. It's not time for that yet. You should know better.

Anyway, I gotta go floss. I've got some bready-green beany-mashed potatoey debris stuck between my teeth.

Sept. 7, 2006 Day 253: Look Who I Found

2006-09-06T23:09:00.000-07:00

After a 14-day search, scooting across hardwooded floors, tiled bathrooms and carpeted bedrooms, I finally found Popo the cat.

Well, actually, he found me.

Turns out he wasn't hiding from me afterall. We just kept missing each other.

Next time I can't find him, I'm just going to stay put because ol' reliable Popo is sure to come meowin along sooner or later. That crazy cat!

Sept. 5, 2006 Day 251: Hudson Rolls in Weekend Parades

2006-09-05T18:29:00.000-07:00

Yesterday I took a day off from my daily baby workload to celebrate some other workers in the Labor Day parade.

Daddy B told me that the people holding flags were from something called a union.

I would like a flag of my own someday, so I think that I will start my own union. It will be called the HU-BABIES union. That stands for Hudson's United Babies union. If you're interested in joining, send an e-mail to swaddlereport@gmail.com, and list your name and the color of the flag you would like to have and the picture you would like to be on the flag. I will be working on my own flag that I hope to have finished in 23 days. It will be blue and have the name of the union on it and a picture of me, since this was my idea.

Before I go to get started on my flag, I would like to wish a happy #1 birthday to my friend Clementine. I was in Clementine's parade this weekend and I rolled in my stroller while she rode in a bicycle. I am in discussions with my parents about getting my own bicycle, but it's not my birthday yet.

Aug. 28, 2006 Day 243: Gone Fishing

2006-08-28T17:46:00.000-07:00

I'm back from my weekend fishing expedition, and boy did I reel in a big one.

I asked Mom and Dad to give the fish to Auntie MD for her birthday on Sunday, but they decided to give her some clothes instead... boring!

That's OK. I will keep the fish as a trophy to put up in my bedroom, next to my official major league baseball and the keepsake box where we stored my very first-ever dirty diaper... just kidding. That would be gross.

Well, I've got a busy week, so I should get back to work... let me look in my planner. Yep. I've got a meeting Tuesday morning with some of my toys to discuss an upcoming event we're planning, and then I've got a nap at 2 p.m. ... and Wednesday, oh Wednesday is a crazy day. I've got a breakfast scheduled for 7:30 a.m., followed by a seminar titled, "From Scoot to Walk: Why Bother With the Crawl?"

Aug. 28, 2006 Day 243: Swaddle Report Issues First Retraction

2006-08-28T09:53:00.000-07:00

It was recently brought to my attention by Auntie Lou that there was a boo boo in my July 10, 2006, post, "World Cup Fever: Hudson's Tribute to Italy!"

In the final paragraph I said that I am Polish and Irish, but had no Italian roots. Well, I just found out that I do, in fact, have some Italian in me.

I feel bad about the mistake, but I'm happy to hear this news. This means that part of me is a World Cup champion. I will toast this news with a sippy cup full of apple juice.

Aug. 24, 2006 Day 239: Where's That Cat?

2006-08-23T21:00:00.000-07:00

Hey. Have you seen my cat, Popo?

I've been scooting all over the house trying to find him... I think he's hiding.

Daddy B calls us Tom and Jerry.

I wanted to tell Daddy that my name is Hudson and not Jerry, but I didn't want to hurt his feelings. Momma Cj says that he's a sensitive man.

I have sensitive skin... it rashes up when I drag my bare belly across the carpet.

Popo has sensitive skin, too. When I squeeze it, he runs away... "Popo! Hey Popo! Come here Popo... I just want to talk!"... Oh well, I'll find him eventually. In the meantime, please take some time to participate in the Swaddle Report's first-ever poll:

&amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;lt;a&amp;amp;amp;gt;Take the poll&amp;amp;amp;lt;/a&amp;amp;amp;gt;&amp;amp;amp;lt;br&amp;amp;amp;gt;&amp;amp;amp;lt;br&amp;amp;amp;gt;&amp;amp;amp;lt;a&amp;amp;amp;gt;Free Poll by Blog Flux&amp;amp;amp;lt;/a&amp;amp;amp;gt;

Aug. 20, 2006 Day 235 SPECIAL EDITION: Hudson's Tips for the First-Time Zoogoer

2006-08-20T18:47:00.000-07:00

Today I went to the zoo for the first time ever in my whole life. And I would like to share with you, my blog readers, the five must-do things for a baby who visits the zoo for the first time ever in their whole life:

1. KISS A POLAR BEAR: They're not as mean as they look.

2. LAUGH AT THE HUMPY HORSES: How can you not laugh at them? Look at those... ha... ha... silly horses... Ha... Ha... Ha... Oh, I can't stop laughing... Ha. HA... HA... HAHA!!

3. CHEW ON A TURTLE STATUE: It tastes like chicken... Oh. Wait. I don't know what chicken tastes like... how bout... It tastes like mashed organic green beans.

4. MAKE FRIENDS WITH A BABY ELEPHANT: You might have more in common than you think.

5. ACT LIKE A GORILLA: How else would you act? It's a zoo for goodness sake... but one extra FREE piece of advice to you babies out there -- Keep the gorilla behavior at the zoo. There's no place for it at home. When you're at home, act like a good baby boy or girl. Trust me, you'll get lots of hugs and sweet potatoes if you do. That's all for today. Hope the tips will make your visit to the zoo for the first time ever in your whole life a good one.

Aug. 12, 2006 Day 227: My New Drum Set

2006-08-12T06:44:00.000-07:00

OK, so I lost the battle with Momma CJ and Daddy B over my refusal to take off my American flag half-trousers, but that was an uphill fight since I don't know how to dress myself yet.

But I do like the new outfit they put me in. What do you think?

Also, I got a new drum set out of the whole deal. And from what I can tell, it's a pretty good one. I bet you Mom and Dad spent lots of monies on it... I hope they have enough left over to get me some more sweet potatoes and spinach lasagna.

Maybe I should start pitching in some around here. I bet if I get good at these drums, people would pay to see me. OK. I got to go. It's practice time.

Aug. 7, 2006 Day 222: Barefoot in the Park

2006-08-07T19:45:00.000-07:00

During a recent visit to the park, I noticed that my mom had dressed me in a pair of half-trousers with an American flag pattern on them.

It was at that moment that I, Hudson, got my first taste of patriotism... I realized that I was as American as organic apple baby food, baseball and Jeep strollers.

I've now been wearing those shorts for four days, and despite some wrastling with mom and dad, I refuse to take them off... because that would be un-American. And to all of my blog readers who send me clothes in the mail, you can donate them to some other non-patriotic infant. I have all the clothes that I need.

July 31, 2006 Day 215: Hudson Says 'It's Time to Cool Off'

2006-07-31T19:06:00.000-07:00

Hello blog readers. Usually I take this time to post something really cool that I'm doing, or some major development in my life, but today I'd like to share with you some helpful advice in a segment I like to call "Hudson's Beat the Heat Tips."

It's hot outside. I think it's, like, one hundreds degrees or something like that. Dad showed me the thermometer reading, but I put it in my mouth instead of paying attention to what it actually said. But I know it's hot! I can feel it in my baby toes. Hot! Hot! Hot! So if you want to keep your toes cool, try following "Hudson's Beat the Heat Tips" There's four of them, and they go a little something like this:

1. Hydration, hydration, hydration: I always say, when it's hot and you're on the go, there's nothing better than H2O
2. The diaper is the rage in summer fashion: When you need to cool off, take it off
3. Take your drool to the public pool: Splashing in the water cools you off, and helps reduce stress
4. Hire Hudson for more cooling off tips: I've got bunches of them, but if you want to hear more, it will cost you. I work for jars of sweet potatoes

July 25, 2006 Day 209: Back in Black

2006-07-24T22:52:00.000-07:00

The days of cute are over. I got my first black eye and I'm feeling tough these days.

Are you cooing to me? Are you cooing to me?

That's right. I jumped off the couch and put my face to the wood floor, but I didn't cry... OK, I had a few tears, but I think it was an allergic reaction to the polish in the floor, because I'm done crying. Crying is for babies.

Well, I gotta go now. I'm going to slip on my leather Harley jacket that Grandma D gave me and try a few more stunts. But I sure would like a bite to eat before I step into action. Man, am I hungry. Mom, can I have some food? Mom! Mommmmmmmy!

July 18, 2006 Day 202 SPECIAL EDITION: Sonny in the Sunshine State

2006-07-19T20:31:00.000-07:00

I'm back from Florida and I'm tanner than ever. Just kidding. Momma CJ kept the sunblock flowing, so I still look like a little Michigan ghost.

I asked Mom and Daddy B to send a postcard for me to my blog readers while we were on vacation, but they forgot. Mom apologized and said she and Daddy had too many of those green drinks with the salt on the sippy area.

But I'll make it up to you now with something I like to call Hudson's day-late postcard. Here goes:

Wish You Were Here
We're in Florida! This is my second trip (the first was Chicago), but this time we went really high in the air in a plane to get here. We're staying with Auntie MD and Mr. Joe at a place Momma Cj likes to call "her resort." It has a pool and lizards and green drinks and palm trees.

On Friday, we spent the day next to the pool with Auntie MD. She gave me my own boat to float in and I splashed water and went under the waterfall. I wasn't impressed with pools before, but now I see what the hype is about.

On Saturday we went to the Sunken Gardens and I had to wear a bug rub to protect me from the giant bugs. It was quite an adventure, and I prepared myself by putting on my safari hat and crawling my way through this jungle. (OK. I can't crawl yet. Just humor me for now. It makes for a better story).

On my journey through the gardens, I stopped to talk to a giant bird. He said "Hello," and I responded to him by speaking in chirps. It was my way of saying, "Hey. Mr. Bird. If you're going to take the time to speak my future language, why don't I take the time to speak yours ... Chirp. Chirp. Chirp."

On Sunday, the astronauts woke me up with a sonic boom before landing their shuttle on the ground. After some breakfast and a change of clothes, I was off to another jungle -- the outlet mall. Momma Cj and I strollered from store to store while Daddy B sat on benches reading pieces of paper.

Monday we went to the Orlando art museum to see pictures of Brown Bear Brown Bear and the Hungry Caterpillar and the Grouchy Ladybug and the Handsome Baby (I made that last one up. Maybe I'll submit my photo and suggest it to Mr. Eric Carle). After that, it was time for a nap before our big night at Chili's restaurant.

We went to the Chili's that, I think, Auntie MD built with her own two hands. Me, Momma CJ, Daddy B and Mr. Joe put on our "sizzle" before making the journey to the restaurant. I had a vegetable appetizer and finished that off with Chili's famous soy milk. We then posed for a picture before heading back to "the resort" to sleep away our final night ...

I like vacations. When we get back, I'm going to ask Momma Cj and Daddy B if we can go on another vacation. Maybe we can go on the astronauts' next trip and make sonic booms. I'm going to start packing now. Where's that space suit of mine?

July 10, 2006 Day 194 World Cup Fever: Hudson's Tribute to Italy!

2006-07-09T21:07:00.000-07:00

Congratulazioni Italia! Ho guardato il mio primo finale di tazza del mondo questa fine settimana.

Era un fiammifero avanti e indietro fra l'Italia e la Francia.

Ero al bordo della mia sede durante la scossa di pena rotonda ed incoraggiato quando l'Italia lo ha tirato fuori nella scossa di pena rotonda all'estremità.

Congratulazioni Italia! Non sono italiano ed ho avviato la tazza del mondo sradicare per l'Irlanda o la Polonia, ma sono felice di vederle vincere.

July 4, 2006 Day 188: Saddle Up -- It's Independence Day

2006-07-05T20:04:00.000-07:00

I spent my first Fourth o' July holiday with Eddie and Tina.

Eddie and Tina are horses that live at the Greenfield Village. They like to drink water and eat the ground. Although I am not a horse, I too like the taste of water, and have tried the ground and think it tastes pretty decent.

After spending some time with my animal friends, Grandma and Grandpa B and Momma Cj and Daddy B took me to watch some fireworks in the sky. They all got scared by the boom, but I just took it all in stride.

I also went to the tasting fest near my home in Detroit over the holiday. Momma Cj and Daddy B ate saucy pork and potato fries that looked like waffles. What did I eat? Soy milk. I tried to grab at the saucy pork, and reach for the waffly taters, but I was once again denied. But that's OK. I'm going to save up all my monies and buy, like, a zillion tickets next year so I can have my own pork and taters. And don't even try to reach for mine, or I'll send my friends Eddie and Tina after you!

June 30, 2006 Day 184: Hudson Passes Up World Fame

2006-07-04T08:21:00.000-07:00

So I had a chance to become world famous after the World Famous Pontani Sisters swept through town.

The girls stopped by for a photo op and they were immediately impressed by my talents: eating kiwi, squealing and chewing on things.

They offered me a spot on their North American tour, but I regretfully and respectfully had to turn them down because of some scheduling conflicts.

I'm supposed to learn how to crawl in the next few months, and I have to go to Orlando for an upcoming gig that I'd rather not discuss at this time, so, I'm pretty booked. And my parents would not be able to deal with me being on the road for that long. They would pretty much fall apart. But who could blame them?

The girls were pretty upset (as you can see in the picture to the right) when I broke the news to them that I wouldn't be joining them on the circuit. But, they eventually got over it, and we hugged and kissed and told each other to break our legs. For those of you who are not familiar with showbiz terminology, breaking legs is an expression of good luck. For instance, before I prepared this blog entry, I was a bit nervous ... I had caterpillars in my stomach, so I looked in the mirror that's in my crib and I gave myself a pep talk. I said, "Hudson. You can do this. You've done this before. The people who read this blog like you, and they're rooting for you. Now, go out there and show them everything you got. Break a leg Hudson. Break a leg."

June 25, 2006 Day 180: Rolling Rolling Rolling...

2006-06-25T20:35:00.000-07:00

I mentioned it in my last post, but I thought it worth mentioning again: I am officially rolling over, baby.

Put me on my back and I make it to my front. Put me on my front and I make it to my back. Doesn't matter.

Put me on clay, hardwood, grass. Doesn't matter.

Put a blindfold on me. Doesn't matter.

When it comes to rolling, I'm it.

Watch out crawling. You're next.

June 19, 2006 Day 174: Postcard From a Baby in Chi-Town

2006-06-19T19:34:00.000-07:00

This weekend was my first trip to Chicago, and since I didn't have time to send all of you, my blog readers, a postcard, I thought I'd send it to you now, electronically. Here goes:

Dear Blog Readers,

Having fun in Chicago this weekend. Watched Daddy B run something called a 5k (if you do the math, that equals about 14,000 crawls).

And, I met a monster! Don't believe me? Just check out the picture on this postcard. Seeee. It's a monster, isn't it. Jealous yet?

I also got to meet Mr. and Mrs. D. They gave me a jersey that said 'Cubs' on it. And, I don't know why, but Mr. D didn't seem to like the monster all that much. Daddy B explained to me that socks and Cubs don't get along. I guess that means when I wear my 'Cubs' jersey, I'll have to go barefoot.

Baby D couldn't come out and play yet because Momma CJ said he has a booboo on his head, but I'll have to show him some of my new tricks the next time I visit ... like rolling over. That's right. You read it. I said it. I'm officially a roller overer now.

OK. We've been waiting in line for something called popcorn for the past three hours and I think it's our turn now. I hope this popcorn is good ... wait, can I eat popcorn? Don't tell me I waited in line three hours for something I can't eat! Anyway, got to run now. See you back in Detroit!

Fondly,
Hudson

June 12, 2006 Day 167: Leave It to Hudson

2006-06-12T17:57:00.000-07:00

I had my first professional photo shoot a couple of weekends ago, and I'm not sure if something was wrong with the camera, but all of the colors are gone from the pictures. They're just gray.

Daddy B said it was something they call an "artistic choice," but I thought I looked like a character from "Leave It to Beaver."

H: Hey Wally. It's me Hudson. Where's the Beav?

W: Gee. I don't know Hudson. Why don't you go ask Gilbert.

H: Hey Gilbert. Where's the Beav?

G: Aw gee. I don't know Hudson. Why don't you ask Larry?

H: Hey Larry! Where's the Beav? Hey Larry!

L: Gee. You don't need to holler at me Hudson.

H: Sorry.

L: Beaver is getting his picture taken.

H: Well I sure hope it's in color.

L: Naw. I think it's in black and white. They call it an articstics choice.

H: Oh brother.

June 1, 2006 Day 156: The Faces of Hudson

2006-06-01T21:12:00.000-07:00

It's now June, and as I approach my 6-month birthday, I find myself going through a range of emotions:

SCARED. Being a half-year-old child means more responsibility -- solid foods, movement, first words.

SUSPICIOUS. This aging thing may be a government conspiracy.

HAPPY. I've got a comfortable crib to sleep in, my own horse that rocks and a community of blog readers and family members that dig me. Life is pretty good.

May 29, 2006 Day 153: Holiday Siesta

2006-05-31T17:03:00.000-07:00

If you're wondering where I've been blog readers, well, it's holiday time, and that usually means it's time for a nap.

Momma CJ and Daddy B took me swimming for the first time in a public pool. It was OK, but I don't see what they were making such a big splash about (bringing back the old Nurse Irene humor for you longtime readers). Frankly, I wasn't impressed with swimming. I mean, it's just water. It was basically like I was taking a bath, except there were a lot of other people in this tub.

I would try swimming again, but if I had to choose between a pool and a nap on a baby-friendly hammock, well, I think the picture explains it all.

May 18, 2006 Day 142: Guilty Feet Have Got No Rhythm

2006-05-22T18:51:00.000-07:00

Last week I went to my first dance...

I was just chilling, listening to the music and drinking some soy punch when this girl named Clementine asked me to dance. I must say, I'm usually a cool and calm character, but when she approached me, I suddenly felt weak in the knees, like I couldn't even stand anymore. Then I remembered, oh yeah, I really can't stand.

I suddenly found myself moving back and forth to the music. I don't think Clementine knew it, but I was using her as support to keep me from falling on my forehead. It also helped that I had my teething ring to make me feel secure.

When the song ended I realized that the teething ring I thought I had in my mouth was Clementine's hand. We both laughed out loud at the silliness of it all. Feeling like the ice had been broken, I confessed to her about not being able to stand and all. "In fact," I told her through raucous laughter, "I can't even crawl." The laughter grew louder and louder. "Guess what Clementine. I haven't even rolled over yet." And then there was an awkward silence... before we both burst out laughing again. It was all great fun, and I learned a valuable lesson that I'd like to share with you, my readers: You shouldn't pretend to be a dancer before you've learned how to walk.

May 14, 2006 Day 138: Top Ten Things I Like About Mom

2006-05-14T20:33:00.000-07:00

I was struggling to come up with the words to say to mom in my blog for Mother's Day. I tried stealing some phrases from songs, like "You are the wind beneath my wings," "Momma you're appreciated," or "I'm sorry momma," but I wasn't feeling any of those.

So, then it dawned on me to do a Top Ten list. I mean, what mother wouldn't want a Top Ten list in her name on Mother's Day? It was like, "Duh Hudson. Why didn't you think of that in the first place?" Anyway, here's the list mom. Hope you enjoy it. If not, let me know, because I have a list of about 227 great things to say about you that I can pull from if you don't like the 10 that I selected below (Blog readers you must admit that was pretty good, wasn't it?). Please note mom that I've selected a beautiful lavender font for your Top Ten list (It's the little things that matter people).

Top Ten Things I Like About Mom
#10: She's got great hair, and she doesn't get mad when I pull it or chew on it.
#9: She smells nice.
#8: Strong singing voice. I feel bad for babies who have to listen to lullabies from mothers who do not have a trained instrument.
#7: Food source. This is a weird thing to say mom, but I know it hasn't always been easy to feed me, so without getting into too many details, I'll just say thanks for supplying me with the nutrients I needed to grow into a healthy 4-month-old boy.
#6: She's a great teacher. I know that when the day comes that I roll over on my own, I'll owe it all to her discipline and guidance.
#5: She's beautiful, or "easy on the eyes" as my dad likes to say.
#4: She's smart. I'm amazed at how well she can read a book. And I'm even more amazed that she can read a book without chewing on the pages. Books taste so good. I don't know how she can resist.
#3: Did I mention beautiful? I feel sorry for babies who have to wake up to an ugly mother.
#2: Best "Momma's Nose/Baby's Nose" player ever. This is, like, one of the best games ever if you haven't played it yet, and if it wasn't for my mom's mad skills at this game, I wouldn't even know the difference between my nose and my kneecap.
#1: Mom's smile. They call me a happy and smiley baby, but that's because I learned from the best. Hope this Top Ten list brings a smile to your face mom. Thanks for all that you do!

May 13, 2006 Day 137: Spoon Man

2006-05-14T20:20:00.000-07:00

Yes. It's true. I eat from a spoon now. I'm spoon fed.

Whether you bring the spoon in choo choo train style, or like an airplane circling into my mouth, it doesn't matter. I'll eat it.

Mr. Cereal doesn't have a chance against my two bottom teeth, and all I can say is watch out Mr. T-bone Steak. You're next.

May 8, 2006 Day 132: ♫Down Down Baby, Yo Street in My Stroller♫

2006-05-08T19:26:00.000-07:00

Welcome to my new ride. It's the Jeep® Liberty Limited Urban Terrain stroller, and it has all the babies turning their heads, dropping their jaws and drooling.

This unique three-wheel all-terrain stroller is built for a smoother ride on all types of surfaces. The front wheel swivels for easy maneuvering when mom and dad want to take me for walks on city streets, or when my grandmas show me off at the suburban malls.

For those of my readers who are concerned about my safety, don't sweat it. The Liberty Limited has a five-point safety harness with a multi-position reclining seat, removable saddle bags and safety reflectors.

And don't be fooled by the ruggedness of this stroller. It's as smooth a ride as I've ever had. I like to just sit back and relax and pop my theme song in the CD player:

May 1, 2006 Day 125: Hudson on Hudson

2006-05-01T20:26:00.000-07:00

The following excerpt is from June Crosby's interview with me, featured in this month's edition of Baby Blogger magazine. Since I don't drive, June was kind enough to visit me in my private study, where we laid on our stomachs for a face-to-face chat.

J: Why blogging?

H: Why not? I mean, without blogging, I'd probably eventually end up crawling the streets.

J: Now, you include several pictures of yourself in your blog. Some might consider that to be vain.

H: The pictures are mainly for my aunties who are out of town, and for my grandmas. And let's face it June, I've got a good face. Why not show it?

J: You do have a cute face.

H: Handsome is a better word.

J: OK. Now, do you consider yourself to be an introvert or an extrovert?

H: I'm a baby June. Those words mean nothing to me.

J: What I'm asking is, are you an outgoing or energetic baby? Or, are you quiet?

H: I know what you're getting at June. You're asking if I can roll over yet. The answer is no. I'm close, but I'm still not there yet. That's a sore subject. Can we move on please?

J: Yes. Sorry. I've asked this of other baby bloggers, but, do you type your own stories?

H: I used to, but now that I have two bottom teeth, I can't stop myself from wanting to chew on the keyboard ... so, my dad types them for me.

J: Have you ever stayed up past your bedtime to do a blog entry?

H: No comment.

J: Now, you're 4 months old, correct?

H: Four months and 2 days.

J: Do you think you'll continue blogging into your toddler years?

H: Absolutely. Blogging is very therapeutic for me. It gives me that same feeling of release that I get when going for a walk in my stroller, or screaming in my sleep or filling my diaper.

J: Where do you see your blog going? I mean, you've covered special events such as the Super Bowl and your Baptism, what's next?

H: Well, this is supposed to be a secret, but I'll share it with your readers and the readers of my blog. We're in the planning stages of my 6-month birthday party, the "half birthday bash," on June 29. After the party, I'll post a special entry on the blog recapping my first 6 months of life.

J: Well, we can't wait to see it. It's been a pleasure, Hudson.

H: The pleasure is all mine ... June?

J: Yes, Hudson?

H: Do you mind if I borrow your keys?

J: But you don't drive.

H: I know, but I would like to chew on them.

April 14-16, 2006 Day 106-109 'Just Add Water': Baptismal Blowout SPECIAL EDITION

2006-04-21T17:39:00.000-07:00

Hello readers. Welcome to this SPECIAL EDITION of The Swaddle Report, titled, "Just Add Water," the story of my baptismal weekend, or blowout if you will.

As you may have already noticed, I have a new chair. It's very comfortable, and before I continue with this post, I would like you to get comfortable. Sit back. Relax. Grab a bottle of milk, or soy if you prefer, take a deep breath and join me on my journey...

DAY ONE: Welcome Home Aunties
The weekend started with the aunties returning home on Friday -- Auntie MD (no, she's not a doctor), and Auntie HB (no, she's not a horticultural biologist).

Momma CJ and I went to pick up Aunt MD from the airport and I tried to help her with her bags, but remembered I can't get out of my carseat on my own, and the heaviest thing I've lifted to date is a stuffed dog. But I could tell Aunt MD appreciated the offer. Aunt MD came over our condo and we chilled for a while before going over to Grandma and Grandpa D's house.

As you can see, Aunt MD, a.k.a. The Godmother, and Grandma D gave me a dry run (no water) of what I would be going through at my baptism on Saturday night.

When I returned home, I walked up the steps (actually, I was carried) to see Auntie HB and Grandma B sitting on the porch outside our condo building. When we got inside, Daddy B ordered some Greek food and we later sat down to eat. I didn't eat Greek food. I ate soy milk, but I pretended like my soy milk was a plate of warm spanakopita. Auntie HB and Grandma B then helped put me to bed to prepare for my big day. I must admit I was a little nervous, and had some trouble falling asleep. But I was able to dose off by counting Greek sheep.

DAY TWO: The Pressure Is On

According to "My Baby's First Dictionary," the word baptism is defined as:
1. A religious sacrament marked by the symbolic use of water and resulting in admission of the recipient into the community of Christians.
2. A ceremony, trial, or experience by which one is initiated, purified, or given a name.

After reading this definition, I realized that this was a big deal, and that I should probably take a bath.

After having Daddy B scrub me down and apply the appropriate product to my hair, the nerves started to go away, and I started to get pumped up about my pending purification.

Auntie HB and Grandma B came over and I put my game face on as we all pitched in to help clean the condo for Part I of the blowout.

I acted as supervisor, sitting in my swing, pointing out fur balls that Daddy B missed with the swiffer, or cobwebs in the corners that Momma CJ overlooked. I also let out my patented chicken call whenever they would get too busy, and stop paying attention to me. This is my day people. Hello?

And just as we made the finishing touches, in came The Godfather -- who I'll refer to as Godfather B -- and his partner, A, who I'll refer to as GPA (which stands for Godfather's Partner A... is this all making sense? If not, refer to the book, "My First Guide to Baby Blog Acronyms").

Godfather B and I got to spend some QT (see Acronym book) together before the crowds started to arrive.

OK. I have to admit, I wasn't completely cool the whole day through. At one point during Part I of the Baptismal Blowout, I started having a little bit of preshow jitters, and with the large group of people in my condo, I had a small screaming fit.

But it didn't last long, and I was able to recoup just in time for the big ceremony, which featured a fire, a walk in the dark, some singing, some sea monkeys, and then, finally, the big splash.

And wouldn't you know, at the end of the night, when the minister welcomed me and four other babies into the community with some water over the forehead, who was the only child that didn't shed a tear? It was me. But I'm not saying that I'm better than any of those babies -- although Grandma D may disagree -- I'm just saying I know how to come through in the clutch. I'm a true performer. Put me in front of a crowd and I shine like a ... like a ... let's just say I'm very shiny.

DAY THREE: Another Blowout, This Time With Eggs

Part II of the Baptismal Blowout featured an egg hunt, hosted by yours truly. Included in each egg were some delightful candies, possibly a lottery card or gift certificate to a certain coffee chain, and my patented HEY YOU sayings.

Everyone came out a winner in my egg hunt, including me. I was rewarded with a bottle of soy, and while I was eating it, I imagined that it tasted like a solid chocolate bunny.

Grandma D put together a fabulous spread for the masses of people who showed up to get a glimpse, and a hug if they were lucky, of the boy who some are now referring to as God's favorite.

All in all it was a successful and memorable weekend. And I'd like to personally thank those who pitched in for the blowouts, and those who took the time out to attend. Lastly, I'd like to thank you, my readers, for joining me on this journey through this important moment in babyhood.

I now ask that you join me in a cup of tea, as I drink from my new silver Tiffany cup and celebrate this time we've spent together. Cheers.

April 9, 2006 Day 101: Blue Man Group Jr. Auditions

2006-04-09T10:08:00.000-07:00

So, I'm thinking about trying out for Blue Man Group Jr., but I'm a little hesitant because it's such a big commitment -- the body paint, the rehearsals, switching to blue-colored food to be consistent with the character. It's a lot of work.

Momma CJ and I talked about it, and we agreed that we're going to take this in baby steps. We've started with painting the feet blue and banging on some pots and pans with a wooden spoon.

Next week, we'll try painting legs and arms before moving on to the face. If I decide the Blue Men are not my thing, I might try out for "Smurfs on Ice," which is going on tour next winter. Hopefully I can learn to skate by then.

April 8, 2006 Day 100: Little Big Man

2006-04-09T09:57:00.000-07:00

It's been a while since I've written to you, the fans of Swaddle Report, so let me update you on what's going on in my life.

As this picture shows, I am now a 12-year-old boy. I skipped all those boring toddler years, wasting time learning to walk and talk, and went straight to pre-puberty.

I will soon be dating girls, talking back to my parents and preparing for my SATs.

March 26, 2006 Day 86: 'I Could've Been a Contender'

2006-03-25T19:12:00.000-08:00

Daddy B got me a book called "My Baby's First Book of Famous Movie Lines" and I spent some time trying to repeat some of my favorites in the mirror.

Only problem was I forgot I don't talk, so my impression of Marlon Brando consisted of some grunts and moans. But dad said that was actually pretty close to the way Mr. Marlon sounds.

Anyway, since I'm getting frustrated with the whole speaking thing, I thought I'd share some of my favorites with you here, on my blog. These may not be your favorites, but if you have a problem with them, then get your own blog and write your own list! (Sorry for the attitude. It's past my bedtime.)

Hudson's Top Three Movie Quotes:

1. I tried this one out when my parents refused to wake up at 4 a.m. to feed me: "I'm as mad as heck (I'm a baby, I can't swear yet), and I'm not going to take it anymore!"

2. This is also a good one to use if you're ready for a bottle: "As God is my witness, as God is my witness, they're not going to lick me! I'm going to live through this, and when it's all over, I'll never be hungry again ... I'll never be hungry again."

3. And this one is from what I consider to be one of the greatest films of all time, "Look Who's Talking Too": "I don't care what you say, I'm not pooping in that thing. I've got my standards." (Ha ha ha... hee hee... that Mikey kills me. That's one of those movies you can just watch over and over and over.)

March 16, 2006 Day 76: Am I a Vegan?

2006-03-16T20:54:00.000-08:00

I'm done with cow milk. It's udderly disappointing (Sorry. More Nurse Irene humor.)

But now that I've switched to soy, does that mean I'm a vegan? I don't know exactly what a vegan is, but I wouldn't mind being one because it rhymes with a lot of other words, and I could use it when writing poems or rap lyrics. Here's a couple I already came up with.

Poem
Hudson the vegan
Has an aunt named Megan

Rap
Hudson the vegan
You all want to be him
Come to his crib and you might get to see him
So cute to the eye that you'll think that your dreamin'
He's Hudson the vegan ... peeeeace! Soy milk drinkers in the house!

March 7, 2006 Day 69: Nocturnal

2006-03-07T19:51:00.000-08:00

I've been caught.

It was way past my bedtime -- and my parents' bedtime -- when I thought I'd wake to play a little game I like to call, "Seeing."

"Seeing" is, like, such a cool game. All the babies are playing it. All you have to do is wait until it gets really dark, and then just open your eyes. You won't believe how much fun it is.

Only advice I have to all you other babies out there who read my blog is: Make sure your parents don't have a nightvision option on their camera. Momma CJ and Daddy B spotted me with my eyes wide open, and they tricked me back to sleep with a pacifier and some lullabies. That's alright. I'll get them back tomorrow night with a little game I like to call "Screaming Into the Baby Monitor."

Feb. 28, 2006 Day 62: ♫He's a Maniac...♫

2006-03-07T19:06:00.000-08:00

Momma CJ and Daddy B are in a debate. They both agree that I'm kicking my legs and arms more than ever, but disagree on how I'll end up using those skills in the future.

Dad says I'll be a star baseball player. I've already got a glove and an official Major League baseball, courtesy of somebody called the "Umpire."

Mom says I have the legs to make me a great dancer. She bought me my first unitard. It's low cut shoulder helps to accentuate my head bobbing technique.

Feb. 26, 2006 Day 60: Sleep Mode

2006-02-26T19:45:00.000-08:00

Again, I apologize to my readers for being away for so long, but I've been in hybernation since, as Momma CJ described, "The computer got a booboo."

But Daddy B let me use his work computer to just post a shout out. So, this is me shouting out to you.

Shhhh. Be quiet for a second. I sense a feline force nearby, and I think its name is Polo the Cat. I can feel him sniffing at my new fashionable head gear. He should know better than to wake a sleeping bear...

Feb. 18, 2006 Day 52: Party in My Crib

2006-02-18T18:52:00.000-08:00

I had my first crib party this weekend, and it was a great opportunity to invite my new friend Duck Boy.

Duck Boy and I chilled and watched my mobile spin round and round for a couple of hours.

We then discussed controversial topics such as diaper rash and crawling vs. waddling, and shared passages from our favorite baby and duck blogs.

After throwing back three bottles of formula a piece, we were pooped and ready to tune into my favorite lullaby CD and tune out for the night.

I tried loaning Duck Boy some of my footed pajamas, but he couldn't squeeze his webbed feet into them. So Momma CJ swaddled us both up real tight in blankets and we were fast asleep, dreaming about things that 52-day-old boys and ... I don't know Duck Boy's age, but he looks a little older. I'm thinking he's maybe 60 days old ... I wonder what 60-day-old ducks dream about...

Feb. 11, 2006 Day 45 SPECIAL EDITION: Super Bowl XL From the Perspective of an XS

2006-02-11T15:22:00.000-08:00

I'm baaaaaaaack! Please forgive me for my absence readers, but I was whisked away last week by Super Bowl XL, an event that some are referring to as the "BIGGEST EVENT IN DETROIT HISTORY SINCE THE BIRTH OF HUDSON" ... OK, so maybe I'm the only one referring to it as that, but it's my blog, and if you want to refer to it as something else, get your own blog! (Sorry, I'm still a little crabby and tired. I think some baby from Seattle -- a miniature Seahawk fan -- stole one of my pacifiers ... sore loser.)

Anyway, to remember this once-and-a-lifetime experience, I thought I'd take you through my Super Bowl Day. It all started with a bubble bath in my own Super Bowl (I still got some of that Nurse Irene humor left over -- see one of my early entries if you don't get that joke.) I wanted to look good for my night on the town, so I asked momma CJ to get me all glossed up -- "Don't forget to wipe under the armpits mom. This is a special night," I said. If you're noticing something that's missing from this picture, don't worry, it's not the settings on your computer. I just thought I'd leave out some of the details I don't wish to share with my readers. It's not that kind of blog.

As you can see, I wasn't pleased with the first outfit Momma CJ put on me. I mean, don't get me wrong, overalls are great and all, but this is the Super Bowl, not a monster truck rally.

But we recuperated, and I was dressed and ready to go to show Detroit that there ain't no party like a Hudson party because a Hudson party... a Hudson party... I don't remember the rest of it, but it doesn't matter, because most babies my age don't even know what it's like to be Hudson.

Let's just say that I'm a baby who knows people ... I have lots of friends, and made many more on my Super adventure, including some cowboys...

a taxi driver (pictured, right)...

and the paparazzi. No more pictures, please. No more pictures, I said!

All in all, it was a night to remember, and me and Daddy B were worn out from this manly experience, so we took a manly nap, like bears would ... tough grizzly bears ... because we're men, and this day belonged to us.

Sorry mom, for not including your pic in this entry. I promise to get you back on Valentine's Day or some other feminine holiday ... Wow, I think that may have been my first chauvinist comment ever. Don't blame me mom. It's the Super Bowl talking... It's the Super Bowl.

Feb. 6, 2006 Day 40: Birthday Shout Out

2006-02-06T10:03:00.000-08:00

Haven't written in a while. I've been caught up in Detroit's Super Bowl fever. Met a few babies from Pittsburgh who were in town for the event. They kept singing that Raffi song, "The Wheels on the Bus." It's a great song, but I grew tired of it after a while. Don't Pittsburgh babies know the lyrics to any other songs? Geez!

Anyway, I'll have more on the Super Bowl later, including some pics, but in the meantime, I wanted to take a moment to wish Grandma B a happy birthday. I couldn't get you a cake, because I'm not allowed to play with candles or any other form of fire, but I did put aside a bottle of formula for your birthday. Just shake it a little bit and it's ready to go. Happy Birthday Grandma!

Jan. 26, 2006 Day Twenty-Nine: Baby Jokes

2006-01-26T19:08:00.000-08:00

Daddy B bought me my first book of jokes. It's called "My Baby's First Book of Jokes."

Man, are there some zingers in there.

Have you heard the one about the boy who lost his pacifier in the well ... hee ... hee ... hee ... ha ... ha ... haaaaaah! Ohhh! I can't take it. Too funny. Too funny.

Or what about the baby who crawled across the road, or the 3-month-old who tried to make three wishes to his Diaper Genie... Ha... Ha... Hee... Heee... Heeeeeeh! Ohhhhh boy! ... I think I need a diaper change.

Jan. 23, 2006 Day Twenty-Six: I Don't Care About Cute

2006-01-23T18:15:00.000-08:00

There's been some debate in recent days about whether my eyes will remain the color blue, and how cute I look with my pretty blue eyes.

Well, I don't care about cute!

I like to think that people will judge me by my personality, my charm, my sense of humor ... and my full head of manly hair. Is there a comb around here? It's a bit messy.

"Hey mom! Bring me a comb, and a little gel while you're at it. And don't forget the mirror!"

Jan. 21, 2006 Day Twenty-Four: Boppy Boredom

2006-01-21T10:14:00.000-08:00

I'm feeling a little down today, blue, you know, because I've got a case of boppy boredom.

Oh how I envy those small children who can get up at will, crawl and walk and knock and spill things over.

Momma CJ and Daddy B tell me that "you're only young once," and that I should enjoy my newborn days because being a toddler is tough.

And I know they're right, and I feel fortunate because most babies my age don't have the ability that I do to communicate with the written word, but I'm ready to move beyond that. I want to walk and talk, have conversations that don't just involve cooing. It's difficult to communicate with grunts and screams. My parents think I need a diaper change, when really I'm trying to express my views on the current state of Latin American politics. Jeez!

Jan. 17, 2006 Day Twenty: Working Out At My Gym

2006-01-18T16:00:00.000-08:00

I'm tired, man. It was my first day at the gym.

I made a bunch of friends there, including a rabbit and a lizard and a cow. The lizard agreed to spot me on the bench press.

I don't mean to brag, but I totally outlifted him.

Now I just need to find the jacuzzi. Maybe the spider above my head knows.

"Hey spider. You know where the hot tub is? ... No hot tub? What kind of gym is this?"

Jan. 15, 2006 Day Eighteen: Sorry About Your Summer

2006-01-15T12:16:00.000-08:00

OK. So I skipped ahead from day eight to day 18 of my life. I tried to update this thing daily, but I'm just too busy with my research on baby sleeping and eating habits.

I found that my research is most effective when I take a hands-on approach by actually doing some sleeping and eating. But I don't quite have enough data to report any results at this point, so I'm going to have a milk dinner and a nap afer I write this.

Anyway, I'm writing to inform my readers that they shouldn't expect the weather to change anytime soon. I saw my shadow for the first time this morning, and, from what I've heard, I think that means winter is never going to end.

I feel terrible about this, but I must say, I enjoy the company of my shadow. He's very handsome, and I think we're going to be longtime friends. So, the only advice I can give to my readers is: buy a warm coat.

Jan. 5, 2006 Day Eight: They Call Me 'Little Rooster'

2006-01-11T15:47:00.000-08:00

Momma CJ and Daddy B have given me the nickname "little rooster" because I like to give them the wake-up call at all hours throughout the night.

I don't think it's a cute or funny nickname. I've seen a rooster at Grandma D's house. She has lots of them and I find them to be rather goofy creatures, and I am hardly goofy. In fact, I'm quite the opposite. I'm non-goofy.

Besides, I'm not the one who has a problem. It's those parents of mine who are always wanting to sleep when there's fun to be had; games to be played, like Diaper Switch, and Rock-a-Bye and my personal favorite, Feed the Baby.

I'm going to start calling my parents grizzly bears because they're always trying to sleep like lazy old grizzly bears. Well, this little "rooster" is not going to let those bears sleep anymore. Cock a doodle doo!!!

Jan. 4, 2006 Day Seven: To Infinity and Beyond

2006-01-07T07:08:00.000-08:00

I spent nine months balled up inside my mother's belly, and have spent the past seven days either trapped inside a hospital or swaddled up in my bassinet at home.

What I'm getting at is: I need to get out! I need a vacation, just to get some breathing room. And I love my parents. They're great. This isn't about them. It's me. I just need a break, you know.

So I thought I would go to space.

I've got my gear on and my vessel is prepared. Now I just need a countdown. Five... Three... Five... Uh oh. I forgot I don't know how to count. Can I get a little help here? Mom? Dad? Kitty? ... This space suit is getting hot.

Jan. 3, 2006 Day Six: The Changing Game

2006-01-06T21:47:00.000-08:00

I'm not one to criticize, but Daddy B is slowwww at changing my diapers.

I'd change them myself, but I need to make these parents of mine feel like they're useful for something.

You'll notice in this photo that I've attached (OK, so maybe someone else got on the computer and attached it for me, but just humor me for God's sake. I'm a baby with a blog. What did you ever do when you were a baby? I thought so.)... Anyway, where was I... Oh yeah. In this photo, try to identify the items that Daddy B has misplaced while attempting to give me a change.

Let's see, there's a sock at my head and a pacifier at my foot. And you can't see it here, but offscreen dad is in a fistfight with the Diaper Genie to get back my other sock that he dropped inside of it.

Jan. 2, 2006 Day Five: Game ON

2006-01-06T21:14:00.000-08:00

Dad introduced me to something called Bowl season.

At first I thought that meant he was going to feed something from a bowl -- which would be totally inappropriate because I'm strictly breast at this point -- but I later learned that it refers to the bowl games played by the top teams in college football.

And we watched some great rivalries, including some teams nicknamed the Nittany Lions and the Seminoles, and the Fighting Irish and the Buckeyes, but those rivalries pale in comparison to the rivalry that's being established in my very own home -- Hudson "The Baby" v. Polo "The Cat."

I've pulled out my playbook of cute looks and crying, but Polo has countered with his scaredy cat maneuver, and is gaining some of the sympathy vote. But I ain't afraid of no kitty. All I have to say to Polo is "It's on fool!"

Jan. 1, 2006 Day Four: Home Sweet Home

2006-01-04T19:38:00.000-08:00

It's home sweet home after a three-night stay at Hutzel "Women's" Hospital, which I like to refer to as the "Ladies" hospital, because I had all the "Ladies" swooning over me.

One of those ladies was my mom, who I'll refer to as Momma CJ.

Although I think Momma CJ was secretly a little bit bitter about the ordeal I put her through -- you know, 17 hours of excruciating pain and all that -- it all changed once she got a glimpse of 22.5 inches and 10 pounds 6 ounces of cuteness.

Dec. 31, 2005 Day Three: It's OK to Drink Champagne

2006-01-03T12:12:00.000-08:00

Today is New Year's Eve.

I'm still in the hospital, but I'm sure mom won't let a little C-section stand in the way of some champagne.

I don't have anything special going on. I just plan on chilling on my boppy, and hope to get a first taste of the bubbly before midnight.

Dec. 30, 2005 Day Two: What's With the Ducks?

2006-01-03T12:07:00.000-08:00

I just started opening my eyes today and I noticed that Grandma B brought me some flowers inside of a duck.

What's with the ducks? No one asked me if I liked ducks. I don't even know what a duck is really.

But, his big orange nose is kind of funny. It quacks me up … Sorry for the bad joke, but I got my first sense of humor from Nurse I.

Dec. 29, 2005 Day One: abCs

2006-01-03T11:51:00.000-08:00

My mother and Grandma D said during mom's pregnancy that I was advanced -- ahead of all the other fetuses in my class. While most of my squirming colleagues were learning simple tasks like breathing, I was practicing my ABCs. The first letter I shared with the world was C, as in C-section.

First off, I'd like to say, "I'm sorry mommy," for this painful experience, but if you ask me, it was nothing compared to the letter I, as in Nurse Irene. Nurse I's jokes were as painful as trying to push out a 10 pound, 6 ounce baby ("Again, I'm sorry mom.")

Anyway, I entered this world just after noon (12:04 p.m.), you know, because that's lunchtime, and it's already, like, 12:23 p.m. Where can a baby get some food around here? Helloooo. it's my birthday. I neeeed foooood! I'm 10 pounds! … But don't you dare call me BIG.