Dec. 29, 2005 Day One: abCs

My mother and Grandma D said during mom's pregnancy that I was advanced -- ahead of all the other fetuses in my class. While most of my squirming colleagues were learning simple tasks like breathing, I was practicing my ABCs. The first letter I shared with the world was C, as in C-section.

First off, I'd like to say, "I'm sorry mommy," for this painful experience, but if you ask me, it was nothing compared to the letter I, as in Nurse Irene. Nurse I's jokes were as painful as trying to push out a 10 pound, 6 ounce baby ("Again, I'm sorry mom.")

Anyway, I entered this world just after noon (12:04 p.m.), you know, because that's lunchtime, and it's already, like, 12:23 p.m. Where can a baby get some food around here? Helloooo. it's my birthday. I neeeed foooood! I'm 10 pounds! … But don't you dare call me BIG.